Woo! We won the Hernandez sweepstakes!

Holy hell! Livan Hernandez? LIVAN FUCKING HERNANDEZ? I love Livan Hernandez!

WHEN HE'S FUCKING NOT 78 YEARS OLD. 

No, no! Of course: this is a great idea! It's an old player who seemingly doesn't have much less in the tank that can come in and fill an immediate and necessary need. Just like Tony Batista, Rondell White, Bret Boone and Ruben Sierra! Think about it: we can just keep doing this to balance out the lineup so that our mean age will be smack in the middle! Age and experience! Here's a mock-up of the perfect Twins lineup and rotation:

1. Rickey Henderson

2. Joe Mauer

3. Chili Davis

4. Justin Morneau

5. Buck O'Neal's corpse

6. Aborted Fetus 

7. Like, we go to an alternate universe where Bob Allison is still alive.

8. Delmon Young 

9. Nick Punto

We can throw Juan Marichal and Liriano in the world's first two man rotation just for fucking kix. 

After the Santana trade, I more or less assumed that we were attempting to solidify a team roster that could carry us until the new stadium, and maybe it still can. And maybe Livan has a couple more good years in him, and maybe he'll help Baker and Bonser along. And maybe the fact that Hernandez is only 32 will outweigh the fact that his arm has thrown enough innings to see the Truman regime. And maybe I can live in a happy gumdrop world where my two favorite Twins weren't given away for a bowl of lukewarm prospect gruel. 

/drinks